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If you have made arrangements for a friend to visit, even if you have discussed it beforehand, send a friendly reminder text, an hour before they are due to show up. This gives your partner plenty of time to go out, barricade themselves in the bedroom, or put on some clothes.
Even if you are splitting the cost of food shopping, and pooling your culinary skills to make dinner, there are some food and drink items that are off limits. If your partner has bought wine, beer, crisps or chocolate, chances are they have plans for relaxing with this little treat, and it would be very bad news for you if they were to discover the goods gone. Before having a sneaky munch on something tasty, check with your partner first.
Very early on establish the boundary that a shut bathroom door is not to be opened. It is not OK to pee in the toilet while your partner is in the shower / brushing their teeth / squeezing their spots. Romance requires a degree of mystery and nothing banishes sexiness like revealing your personal hygiene habits.
Whether its a slightly risque website, your old shared interest dating site profile, or maybe just your partner’s birthday presents, there will often be times when you would rather your other half couldn’t see what you have been doing on the computer. Get into the habit of deleting your browser history when you are finished with your online activities. By making this a daily or weekly ritual you are less likely to forget, and since you have always done this, it won’t raise suspicion with your partner.
Don’t get complacent about how you spend your time together. You might see each other for 30 minutes before heading out for work, and slump in front of the TV at the end of the day, but you still need to schedule in some fun activities to do together.
From the moment you move in together, you both give up a certain amount of decision-making freedom, because all decisions now affect your partner. Want to change your job? If it’s going to affect the time you leave the house, get in from work, or your ability to pay the bills, then you need to talk it over with your partner. Want a pet? That definitely requires partner input. How about a takeaway? Better check your partner doesn’t already have plans for dinner. It might feel claustrophobic at first, but taking into consideration the impact your decisions have on your partner, and talking it over with them is a sign of care and respect.
If your partner is asleep, then it is still night time and you need to be quiet. It may be daylight, and you may be really hacked off that you are up cleaning the house or getting ready for work while they are blissfully counting sheep, but you still need to be quiet, or else face the rage of someone who has been prematurely woken up.
Tonight when you are brushing your teeth, take a good long look at yourself in the mirror, with your lips all lathered up, and a little string of dribble dangling from your chin. Then notice how gross it is when you spit your foamy toothpaste into the sink. Is that something you really want your partner to witness?
Tape these rules somewhere you will see every day, but your partner won’t, like the inside of your wardrobe door, and you will have a secret daily reminder on how to be an awesome person to live with.