That first date with someone you’ve met on a free dating site can be a nerve-racking affair. Although unconventional, bringing a mate along is becoming an increasingly popular option among singles looking for love. Let’s take a look at the potential positives and pitfalls associated with a date + mate meeting.
It’s hard work striking the balance between Dutch courage and loss of consciousness on a date. Now imagine monitoring not just your own alcohol intake, but also your friends too.
Well meaning friends can embarrass you in a multitude of ways, with stories of great exes, bad exes, one-night stands, or that cute thing you used to do while still in Primary school. If you really must invite a friend, choose one that’s teetotal and has a strong internal filter.
How will you feel if your date falls for the friend you bring along instead of you? If you can honestly say you would be happy for them, then go ahead with the double date. But if there’s a risk you could lose your friendship over it, you need to reconsider your plans.
If you both bring along a single friend to the date, you’ve effectively doubled your chances of finding love as now every person around the table has two eligible singletons to choose from. This will only work if you have agreed up front that there are no pre-meditated pairings. If your date is the jealous type they may thwart your attempts to talk to their friend, creating an unpleasantly tense atmosphere for you all to endure.
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Imaging running a relay race for 3 hours solid. That’s how making conversation can feel on a one-to-one date. Add in a few extra runners to lighten your workload and enable you to make the times you are talking enjoyable for you and those around you.
However optimistic your spirit, there’s no denying that sometimes a date is crushingly tedious from the off. You can probably judge in the first few minutes where the date will be delight or a chore. Instead of enlisting your friends in an elaborate back-up plan involving a text calling you to attend to some mystery family emergency, just invite them along. That way you can liven up the atmosphere between the two of you and hope that once your date feels a little more relaxed they loosen up and join in the fun.
Depending on how physically attractive you find the date, and how long you have been in contact before this meeting. you may already be blinded by love / lust. Your friend with a their fresh perspective, and personal interest in your happiness may be able to spot a potential romantic disaster before it happens.
The purpose of going on a date is to get to know the other person better, and determine whether or not you enjoy their company. Get carried away with your mate and you will leave the date none-the-wiser about your potential match. Dating with mates should only be attempted if you are confident you can keep your focus off your friend and on your potential partner.
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Bringing a mate along is an unusual thing to do, so it requires discussion beforehand.
There are two strategies you could use to introduce the idea: